The End of Summer

I don't want our time to be over. All the things that I have said and done, the way I acted, wrong sometimes, but honest. Honest feelings, hidden sometimes. But honest and true. We were in the same game, on the same position, in the same boat. You did not differ from me, in no way. You were as honest and as dishonest as I was. And now we are here. We could be somewhere else. If we tried to be more honest.

Because honesty is the best policy.

I am in such agony .The pain is almost unbearable. The physical pain. The mental one, well I can still handle it. With the spine of mine, I feel already old. As for now, there is No sign of me being unstoppable. I have the "it's all over feeling", the usual feeling when September is standing right on my doorstep, waiting to come in and make it harder to breathe. But I try to remind myself, where I was one year ago, and where I am now. But still September exacts it's toll. It's the end of Summer. The can already sense the specific smell in the air, especially in the evenings. The different light, the way the sun rises and sets.

I feel odd. I hope the pain to be gone soon, so I can go to Italy. To start something new. But do I want to?